Tags
12, coffee, comedy, Dennis, energy, flashback, Google, heat, horse, ladder, Leary, melt, milk, oak, ride, stand-up, summer, sun, time, tree, weather
“I will ride when it cools off later”. How many times have we said those words? Sure, it often starts getting cooler as the sun starts getting swallowed up by the impending night, but not tonight. Even as the sun is melting into the horizon I don’t feel any forgiveness in the heat or humidity. In fact, it might even be getting worse.
While I’m waiting to “ride later”, I am keeping Father Time company by trimming tree branches. From a 12 foot ladder. That I continually have to climb up and down after moving said ladder a few feet (or yards) at a time. Yes, it’s definitely hotter. And sweatier. And buggier. They say that heat rises but does 12 feet really make that much of a difference?
So with no energy left to ride and piles of dismembered oak limbs scattered all over the yard, I feel like the sun melting away; stinky and sticky with bug spray and sweat I just feel . . . gross. Yes – if you looked up “gross” in the dictionary right now there would be a picture of me. A big picture. In color. With words in bold print. Ask me how I feel and I will say “Gross! Haven’t you seen my picture?” I’m melting so fast my picture might on the side of the milk carton soon too. If you read these words as fast as I am thinking them, you might have a slight flashback of Dennis Leary. That’s how crazy gross I feel right now – like a crazy Dennis Leary skit. (Coffee-flavored coffee, anyone?)
Not that Dennis Leary was gross (well, sometimes, maybe, but in a different way, haha); if you remember him I bet you have a sly smile on your face or a chuckle in your head. Anyway, back to the weather. The horses will get a reprieve tonight and I will get a shower. I bet you will be Googling some old stand-up routines….